Chapter 6: The Child Has Died, Yet You Come to Nurse?

The Tyrant flicked the ash from his suit and blew a smoke ring. "We intend to send you to infiltrate the humans and become their ruler."

"What the hell? Are you talking nonsense, Bro Tyrant?"

"I've read post-apocalyptic novels. The ones who do well are the high-level ones. I'm not even a First-Tier! In short, I refuse!"

Li Xingyue retorted repeatedly. He was doing just fine here, with food, drink, and cigarettes. In his previous life, he had worked himself to death; now, he just wanted to lie flat. Besides, this mission sounded like a death trap!

Thinking of the Nun who was always closest to him, Li Xingyue grabbed her arm and shook it, his tone slightly coquettish. "Sister Nun, surely you wouldn't want your little Yue-Yue to lose his life, would you?"

The Nun stared at him for a few seconds before moving his hand away. "Li Xingyue, as a member of the new generation of zombies, you have the responsibility and the duty to take on this important task!"

Damn it, you used to call me 'little Yue-Yue' all the time!

Blood Moon, who had been sitting on a rocking chair, instantly appeared before him with a kind smile on her face. "How about this? I'll give you three options to choose from. We won't force you."

"One: Agree."

"Two: Disagree, and then you die."

Damn it, and you call that 'not forcing me'?!

"Have you chosen?"

"Hey, you haven't even told me the third option yet! I have the right to know!"

Shura lit six cigarettes at once. "Three is an obtuse angle."

Screw you, Shura. You’re the biggest jerk among the four of you. You really are detestable!

"Damn it! 'In life, one should be a hero; in death, a ghost among heroes.' I, Li Xingyue, will never bow to threats! You can forget about it!"

"Wait? What are you doing? Ah, no, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts!!!"

"No, no, I was wrong! Don't, stop! Quick, stop it!"

"I agree! I agree!"

"Ahhh! I was wrong! Help me! I'm scared!"

"..."

Li Xingyue sat on the ground, feeling aggrieved to the extreme, sobbing while wiping the wet stains off his pants. Just moments after his big talk, Blood Moon had grabbed him by the neck and teleported to the window, tossing him straight out into the sky. The whole sequence was fluid and effortless—it must be said, it was truly stylish and cool!

On the other side of things, Li Xingyue felt like a firework, soaring into the sky, quickly reaching the height of fifty or sixty stories. Then came the rapid descent; the intense sensation of weightlessness made his heart pound uncontrollably. It felt exactly like bungee jumping, only without the cord. Li Xingyue kept screaming, but it was useless. Within seconds, he plummeted to the ground, missing it by less than a meter!

He was a hair's breadth away from an intimate encounter with a female corpse on the ground...

The next second, he was dragged back into the room. He stood up, trembling, and pulled a cigarette from Shura's mouth to take a couple of puffs, which finally helped him calm down a bit.

"Blood Moon, you weren't actually serious, were you? I was just joking with you!"

Hearing this, the Nun immediately approached Li Xingyue and patted his head. "Oh, are you okay, little Yue-Yue? I knew you were just joking. I was actually just thinking about helping you persuade Blood Moon!"

Damn, you’re really something, Nun. You only show up to nurse the child after he's already dead!

Wiping away his tears again, Li Xingyue’s eyes filled with feigned gratitude. "Thank you, Sister Nun. That was a great thought, but don't bother thinking next time!"

After pulling two more cigarettes from Shura's mouth and finishing them, Li Xingyue spoke again. "Tell me, what do I need to do?"

Tyrant: "That's more like it. Your mission is very simple: just make these five cities listen to you."

"..."

"I'd rather just go die!"

Shura: "Stop it, Tyrant. You're making things difficult for Xingyue."

Hey, Shura finally said something human!

"After all, he's weak and cowardly. It'll be a miracle if he doesn't get bitten to death by a First-Tier zombie on the road!"

...I knew it! Dogs can never speak human language!!!

Trying to provoke me, are you? I can't stand being provoked!

"I accept the mission!"

"That's the spirit. Little Xingyue, I didn't hurt you just now, did I?"

"Don't touch me!" Li Xingyue slapped away the hand Blood Moon extended.

Tyrant cracked open a beer. "Don't worry. The five of us have sworn brotherhood. From now on, we're a family. We've got your back!"

"Wait, when did I swear brotherhood with you guys?"

The Nun covered her face with her hands. "Wuwu, little Yue-Yue, you said it yourself while we were drinking yesterday! You even said you wanted to be the boss. Have you forgotten it all?"

Oh! That happened? He had blacked out from drinking yesterday and didn't remember any of it.

Li Xingyue suddenly perked up. "Holy crap, so does that mean I'm the boss of the zombie army now?"

Shura: "Little brother, you might be under a slight misunderstanding. I am the boss, and you are the fifth."

Li Xingyue wanted to say something more, but the Nun stopped crying instantly and glared fiercely at Shura. "What did you just say? I awakened first; by what right are you the boss?"

Blood Moon: "What are you shouting about? Do you have the strength to be the boss?"

Tyrant: "What, do you think I don't exist? I was the first of the four of us to reach the Eighth-Tier!"

Watching the four Eighth-Tier Zombie Kings arguing incessantly over the position of boss, Li Xingyue suddenly felt a sense of balance. He sat to the side, lit a cigarette, and watched the show leisurely.

But before he had even smoked half the cigarette, Li Xingyue grabbed a whole pack, turned around, and ran for his life! The reason was simple: they started fighting.

Just now, Tyrant threw a punch. Shura dodged it, but the half-meter-thick concrete wall couldn't dodge, and it was smashed into a massive hole. Before Li Xingyue could react, the Nun kicked at Blood Moon, and another wall was instantly kicked down. If he didn't run now, he'd be buried alive!

Damn it, these people are lunatics!

As Li Xingyue fled, the four fought even more intensely. A few minutes later, the house they had been in was reduced to ruins. Li Xingyue was already far away, sitting on the curb, smoking and providing commentary. "Tyrant, that guy has speed, but his explosive power is lacking, tsk tsk!"

"Shura, this guy, his explosive power is great, but he lacks speed!"

"The Nun's qipao is quite nice, but the only drawback is that it's too long. It would be just right if it ended at the top of her thighs!"

"Blood Moon has a great figure. If only she were a soft, sweet girl!"

Li Xingyue commented with great confidence, but in reality, when Eighth-Tier Zombie Kings fought at full strength, he, as a mere human, couldn't see a thing. It would be a miracle if a Third or Fourth-Tier could even catch a glimpse of a blur; he could barely see the air right now...

In his eyes, he could only see building after building collapsing with a roar...

Three hours later...

*Gurgle, gurgle, gurgle~*

Huh? Is it lunchtime?

Hearing the signal from his stomach, Li Xingyue hurriedly stood up. However, due to sitting for so long and standing up too quickly, he felt dizzy and saw stars. Damn it, this body was still too weak!

It took a full two minutes to recover. He then shouted at the top of his lungs toward the four who were still brawling: "Time to eat! Mid-game break!"

The sounds of houses exploding continued one after another...

Li Xingyue was silent for a moment, then roared again: "Time to drink!"

As soon as the words left his mouth, the *bang-bang-bang* sounds of houses being destroyed in the distance quieted down significantly, and the four of them appeared in front of him out of thin air.

Damn! I'm so jealous of this speed. If I had this speed in my past life, wouldn't I be able to drink free bubble tea every single day?