Chapter 52: I Shall Hold My Spear Well

Tears washed away the internal fire in her chest like a torrential downpour. Amidst the extinguished embers, she seemed to perceive the heavy shackles upon her body for the very first time.

These shackles, weighty as boulders, had pressed down upon her back day and night, yet she had been entirely oblivious to them.

Because there were always new tasks demanding her attention right before her eyes, and new people constantly appearing and departing around her. Through endless cycles of encounters and farewells, fate always left behind more tangled, piercing emotional cores for her to untangle and resolve.

She had numbly accepted them all without question.

Now that Chiba had given this sensation a name, she tried to comprehend it. But the tears kept flowing, and the confusion in her heart grew heavier. By the end of her weeping, Hesta even felt somewhat dazed; she neither remembered nor cared what she was crying for, feeling only that every single tear was solidly saturated with suffering.

Chiba said nothing. Standing to one side, she neither stopped her nor offered comfort.

After a long while, Hesta's last ounce of strength was completely spent. Her eyes were red and swollen, so weak that she looked as though she might faint at any moment.

Chiba stepped closer. "Done crying? Do you feel a little better?"

Hesta shook her head. She frowned as she looked at Chiba. "What on earth... did Miss Chiba come here for today?"

Chiba raised her right hand, a silver key ring spinning gently at her fingertips like a magic trick.

"Ta-da."

Hanging from the key ring was a small key, identical to the one Sean had snatched away.

In an instant, Hesta felt her eyes grow hot once more.

"It's just a key, nothing to dwell on," Chiba said calmly. "As long as you're alive, there are as many keys as you want."

She placed the key right beside Hesta's hand. "I came today specifically to tell you: anger is important.

"Anger is important because it is a person's only spear in this world. And precisely because it is crude and sharp, when you fall into danger, grow weak, or feel humiliated, it will disregard all worldly etiquette and rules; it will leap out at all costs to protect you and urge you to fight back... Everyone should firmly grasp their own spear."

Hesta regulated her breathing. She gazed at the ceiling, tears spinning within her eye sockets.

I should... grasp my spear.

"Do you know why I came here specifically to emphasize this to you?" Chiba tilted her head and asked.

Hesta swallowed her sobs and shook her head.

"The more vulnerable your position, the easier it is for you to be stripped of the right to feel angry—because this emotion is ugly, lacking in elegance, and carries considerable destructive power. Others can easily push you away even further because of your anger. The base is a place that places an extreme emphasis on order; don't be deceived by the atmosphere here. Especially, do not loathe yourself because of your own anger."

Chiba tapped her own temple. "When you are angry, that is often when you possess the greatest strength—you must learn to harness it."

Hesta listened with total concentration. Her tears dried away without her realizing it. Enduring the pain in her upper limbs, she carefully pondered every single word Chiba had spoken. A storm was surging within her heart, brewing like an impending mountain rain.

"I asked the doctor; they said you should be able to discharge from the hospital in a week or two." Chiba crossed her arms. "Have you figured out what to do once you're out?"

Hesta nodded silently.

"Let's hear it?"

Chiba leaned down toward Hesta, but after listening for a brief moment, she couldn't help but frown.

Amidst their discussion, the visiting hours slipped by swiftly.

Before parting ways that day, Chiba took down her thin trench coat from the coat rack.

"Get some rest, Jane." Holding her tablet near the foot of the bed, she smiled and waved at the immobile girl. "Don't disappoint me."

As night fell, Turan stood outside Liz's door.

"Liz, Liz, can you open the door?"

No one responded from inside.

Turan pressed her forehead against the door panel, her brow furrowed tightly. "Liz, please talk to me. Don't lock yourself in there alone... Please."

Inside, the room was dark.

Liz lay on the floor, curled on her side with her knees drawn up.

Beside her hand lay a wooden photo frame containing a somewhat faded black-and-white family portrait. Liz had her eyes closed, her fingertips resting gently on the glass surface of the frame.

Turan waited outside the door for a long time, but there was still no answer. She walked over to a corner of the living room and used the landline to call Valenti.

Although it was already past nine o'clock at night, Valenti's office phone went through on the first ring.

"Hello?" Valenti answered. "Turan, is it? Yes, go ahead... Mhm, mhm, I understand, mhm. Yes, yes... Don't worry... Get some rest early tonight; Liz also needs some time to process things on her own. I'll go talk to her tomorrow. Mhm, you're welcome, goodbye~"

At the office doorway, Chiba leaned against the frame. "From Jane's dorm?"

"Mhm, Liz's state of mind is a bit low tonight, so Turan called to mention it." Valenti shouldered her bag. "I can leave now."

The two walked down the stairs side by side, soon entering the underground section of the base via the elevator.

"This is the first time I've ever received such an order from Ms. Moly..." Valenti said as she punched in the password. "In the past, she would never have allowed me to bring anyone directly into the archives for new recruits at the base."

"I am hardly 'anyone'." Chiba stood behind Valenti with a smile. "Besides, Ms. Moly has always been very supportive of my work and very reasonable—"

Valenti rolled her eyes and turned her head back. "...Are you serious?"

Chiba raised an eyebrow and pointed at a patch of light that had suddenly brightened ahead of Valenti. "Time for your iris scan."

Valenti let out a chuckle and aligned her eyes with the corresponding scanner.

Soon, after Chiba had also left her biological information, the two officially entered the underground archives.

This was an underground warehouse with a ceiling height of roughly nine meters. As they stepped inside, thousands of cold-light lamps on the ceiling and the rows of shelving gradually illuminated one after another, resembling a wave of light rolling away into the distance.

Chatting as they walked, they headed toward the F-sequence archive zone. Chiba kept her hands in her pockets, her gaze tracking the characters hanging from the rows of display racks.

Chiba walked at a brisk pace, while Valenti jogged to keep up. "Whose file are you looking for this time? The Grangois brothers'?"

"No, I'm looking for Liz Fletcher."

"Liz...?" Valenti looked puzzled. "I should have given you her personal data along with Sean's last time."

"I don't need combat data," Chiba replied. "I want to look into her personal background."

"Why?" Valenti's curiosity was thoroughly piqued. "Aside from Jane, you're interested in someone else at the base now?"

"Of course I'm interested," Chiba replied with a frown. "I saw Jane this afternoon and asked her if she wanted to play for keeps with Sean. She said no, because 'if it gets real, Liz will be hurt'."

Chiba's expression carried a hint of irritation. "Jane hasn't even been at the base for two months, right? What is this Liz's background, leading people astray so quickly?"

Valenti stopped dead in her tracks—the "play for keeps" Chiba was talking about was by no means comparable to the phrase used in ordinary contexts.

"You need to explain yourself first. What kind of keeps? What are you trying to instigate Jane to do?"

"What could I possibly do?" Chiba stopped as well, turning around. "My little girl has been bullied; are you not even going to let me teach her how to fight back?"